Public Works, J David, and the thread I can't see...

I have taken on a part time, temporary job with a local municipality's Public Works department.  I am learning a lot about the inner workings of water pretreatment, park and field maintenance, and other things I never thought about before.

How much do you know about the process of taking waste water from your home to the treatment plant? Not much I'll bet.

How much do you know about the number of man hours it takes to maintain the fields where your children play baseball/football/soccer/lacrosse? Or the disproportionate numbers of hours necessary to open and maintain a swimming pool that operates for 90 days of the year?  Not much I'll bet.

And, if you are like me, you don't really care. Not in a rude way...just a take-it-for-granted way.

Except when the water won't go away or fields are muddy or the pool isn't perfect. THEN we know all about exactly what can and should be done, don't we??

Yeah...no. We still have no idea. Our anger simply fools us.

All of life is like this. We really know so very little, and mostly we are too self-absorbed to care. Until something bad happens.

Beginning in Sept 2010, my friend David - The Rev Dr. J. David Panther - led our church on a nine month journey through the Bible. With an assist from Max Lucado's The Story,  David showed us the wonderful thread that weaves itself from Genesis to Revelation...a thread that consistently shows us the love and care God has for us...a thread that is the Upper Story, God's Story, and His purpose.

We live in the Lower Story.  Lower as in right here on Earth, not Heaven's Story. Lower as in, we often have no idea how things work, nor do we care - as long as we like them.

Then darkness falls. And we demand answers.

Unemployment, addiction, car accident, illness...what is yours? What has happened to you to make you say, "WHY, GOD?"

David is firm and consistent in this message: God never causes a bad thing, and He doesn't like it - but it is the reality of life in this fallen world. And no matter what happens, how much it hurts, how devastated we are, God can lift us out of the mire, clean us from head to toe, and use the negative to make us better.

If we let Him.

David often uses stories to make a point. One sticks in my mind today.  It is the story of a farmer who has a series of events happen. The farmer 's horse runs away. A few days later, the horse returns, bringing a group of young studs with him. The farmer's son breaks a leg training one of the new horses.  The son was unable to go off to war because of the broken leg.

The neighbors are quick to rejoice or mourn, based on their judgment of each event. But to each expression of joy or sorrow, the farmer's response is , "We'll see."

The old farmer understood that we know so little. Our vision is extremely limited. We live in the Lower Story, often not even considering the Upper Story.

One of my favorite David-isms is "This is no surprise to God!"  A master at explaining difficult concepts to stubborn human minds, David has taught me that God has a plan, He knows the end from the beginning, and He will use ALL things to His glory and for my good.

If I let Him.

David  battled lymphoma for over a year.  A determined warrior, he continued to teach about grace and faith.  He was in his office and in services every single time his body would allow it. He smiled through the fight, ministered to others, continued his mission. Jana, his beautiful wife, has been a wonderful example of the healing power of love.

On May 26, my friend David met Jesus.  

We are heart-broken over this loss...for ourselves, for our church, mostly for his beloved family.

It is likely that everyone who knows and has been touched by David has had at least a moment of "WHY?"

He is a man of God who has an amazing gift for preaching and teaching. He can touch everyone - no demographic  is beyond his reach.  He has a heart for the have-nots in our community, and continually challenges us to reach out with God's love. His goal is not adding members, but sharing the Good News. His sermons are lessons in how to apply Biblical wisdom to everyday life.

He is a loving husband, father, son, grandfather, friend, mentor.     

Really God? This man? Right now?

Did You not see all the good he is doing? The changed hearts - some in folks who had never visited a church, some in folks who have sat in the same pew for decades but never had their souls moved? Do You not see how much more he has to do, how many plans he has, how many more people he could reach?

Really God?

There is so much we don't know or understand, isn't there? We want to identify "good" and "bad" - nothing in between, no "we'll see" responses. It makes us feel better, doesn't it?

Yet, even as I type these words I hear David saying , "Hey, kiddo, this is no surprise to God."  I am reminded by David's voice in my head that  in the midst of our grief we must rest in the assurance that God is omnipotent, faithful,  always loving...reminded that while this is not good, God can use it for good...reminded that God knows the plan, and it is a GOOD plan, not for harm.

I hear David reminding me that I don't question the good things, the comfortable ones, the ones I like.  I just accept,  even though I don't understand. I flush water, and drive on roads, and play in the park, never questioning how any of that comes about. But, oh, when something bad happens, I beseech God for an answer I couldn't possibly begin to understand even if He told me.

I hear you, my dear friend. I do. You taught me well. I trust the Upper Story. I trust God's grace and give Him all the Glory.

I know you are restored to perfect health. I know the crown you received is spectacular. I know you have been waiting your whole life to hear, "Well done, good and faithful servant!"

I do know...And I praise God for that.

But I miss you...we all miss you. The little smile, the way your voice squeaked sometimes when you were telling a funny story then boomed when you wanted to make a point, your explanation of what the Hebrew text really means in a given passage, your perpetual motion - coffee in hand. I won't ever hear someone say, "This isn't rocket science!" without thinking of you.

We will carry on your work. We will smile. We will love on your family...and always miss you.

Rest well, dear friend. Can't wait to see you again - you can tell me more about the thread I can't see right now and I will finally understand.

xo

Robin Roberts, yard wanderings and our vision...

I had an interesting dream last night. Well, pieces of a dream - you know how that goes. 

Robin Roberts and her lovely sisters, Sally-Ann and Dorothy were at my door, asking if I was ready to go to dinner. I was in work clothes...clearly not ready.

We will come back to this in a bit.

Yesterday I had the luxury of a few hours to work in the yard. Straightened landscape edging, made spot repairs to the grass, dug weeds, cleaned a couple flower beds - normal "spring" things. Also requires little thought, which allows great praying and mind-wandering time.

This is the 13th spring we have been in this house. I looked around the yard and the neighborhood and thought about how much has changed.

Changed about the yard? Sure. I had a vision for the landscaping when we moved in. In many ways, I have worked that plan. Then changed it.

Changed about the neighborhood? A bit. Some new neighbors. Kids grown.  

Changes about life? Absolutely. Many changes.

How about you? Lots of changes in the last 13 years?

I walked through my yard and laughed some tears thinking about how silly we are when we believe anything about this life is in our control.  Even when we have good plans. Even when what happens is good.

Thirteen years ago, I developed a picture of my yard in my head. As I set it in motion, some of the plants either didn't work where I planted them, or didn't look the way I envisioned. So I changed the plan. Moved flowers, dug new beds, moved flowers again. Plan B then C then...I think I am on Plan F now.

That is what we do, if we are going to be happy and healthy...we change the plan.

In the past 13 years, people have left my life. Some to be with Jesus. Some just because.

I have many new people I cherish so deeply. People I didn't know existed in 2000. And now I love them dearly.

I started a job, ended that job and started a new career path.

Was rescued by a dog who owns my heart.

Been through very dark times...a very good times.

And none of it could have been imagined 13 years ago.

The most predictable thing about life is that it is completely unpredictable.  We want certain things to change and they don't. We want other things to stay the same and they don't. We want out days to go according to schedule and they don't.

We think we always know what is favorable and what isn't...and we don't.

Do you understand...or is it just me?

“In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.”  Robert Frost

TRUTH right there.

Life rarely turns out the way we imagined - daily, weekly, yearly.

Even when we execute well-made plans, even when our dreams come true, it doesn't look exactly as we imagined.

But it goes on.

Ask Robin Roberts about a vision changing. In 2004, her bright star was on the rise at ABC, after 15 years at ESPN.  Since then, she has lost both of her beloved parents, helped her family and her home state of Mississippi recover from Hurricane Katrina, survived breast cancer and myelodysplastic syndromes AND shared her journey with her television audience. But through it all, the Good Morning America team has overtaken the number one spot on morning  television.

More importantly, Robin has continued to love her God, to embrace life, to LIVE life.

Robin Roberts set out to be a sportscaster. Now she is a role model, an inspiration to so many and was recently named the Most Trusted Person on Television by Reader's Digest.

Could she see any of that coming? Unlikely.

No matter what, Robin goes on.

We all do. The question is, how well? How joyfully? How purposefully? How lovingly?

We have the choice - every day, every hour.  Bitter or better? Joyful or miserable? Loving or nasty?

Sure, life hurts. Of course it does. But it hurts for everyone. Hardships are no respecters of anyone.  

And it doesn't turn out the way we planned.

So what are you going to do? Pout? Be less than you can be? Wallow under the hurt?

Or go on?

Back to my dream ...I have been blessed to have occasional email contact and a brief meeting with Robin and  email with Sally-Ann.  Both are incredibly genuine. The woman you see on GMA each morning is the same Robin her friends and neighbors see - kind, caring, the real deal.

In my mind... no, in my PLANS this dream becomes reality. Robin, her sisters and I WILL have dinner.

Maybe it will look like I imagine. Robin or Sally-Ann or Dorothea will read this blog and laugh and say, Dinner it is!!

Or maybe it won't look the same. Maybe they won't come to my house. Maybe we will happen to choose the same restaurant when I am in New York next. Maybe we will run into each other in a grocery store on the Upper West Side...or on the pier while she walks KJ.

In any case, I am going to hold it in my heart and picture it in my mind...just like I do other plans I have.

Plans are certainly necessary.  I work toward my plans. I pray. I believe.

And I understand that my God, who knows all and sees the beginning and the end, has the best plans.

Everything, everything, EVERY.THING. can work together for my good...if I allow it...if I trust...if I can let go.

Will you join me?

Very few things about life will look the way you imagine.

Really. It's true.

Accept that and live. LIVE. OUT LOUD. JOYFULLY. Today.

We will talk again soon...

BP :)

ps I will let you know when I hear from Robin...

Hard questions, laundry, and what I NEED...

Two weeks ago at church, a friend asked if I had been writing - he had not seen any blogs recently. When I told him I hadn't, he asked if I am sad. Sad about not writing? Yes.

What he meant is am I not writing because I am sad? Again, yes.

This question keeps returning to my mind - how much does writing really mean to me? I say it is vital - but my day is filled with other "stuff." So maybe I should  change my words...it is nice, I enjoy it, I do it well - but it isn't vital?

The very notion that it is okay to NOT write literally turns my stomach. And yet, days go by with no words on a page.

 

Have you been there?

Have you had a dream, a gift, a talent you want - no, NEED - to share, but you don't?

When it is suggested to me that I seem "just fine" even though I rarely write, something jumps up inside and wants to cry out...but it ISN'T fine!!

Oh sure, I can get a lot done in a day. Laundry, cleaning, cooking, gym, groceries, giving time to some folks who have needs. And, certainly, those are important tasks.

But if writing is "vital" to my being, to my soul, why does it take a back seat?

Have you been there? Is there something crying to get out, to be given some time and energy? Is there a place where your heart absolutely sings...and at the end of many days, there is a nagging place  that says, "What about me?"

Your soul's need might be something far removed from writing. It might be a possible career path, or it might be a hobby. But it is there. And you probably know it.

This is not to suggest that you abandon any obligations, or stop meeting the needs of your family, or stop hanging out with friends.

What I know is that, for whatever reason, I have been choosing to order my days in such a way that writing has taken a back seat. And it isn't "just fine" at all. That choice has kept my house clean and my laundry done...and my soul longing. It has carried me to a place I do not like.

So today, in the midst of the laundrycleaninggroceries cycle, I stopped...and I wrote this.

It's a step.

I believe there are many reasons beneath the surface for the choices I have made. Part of THINK BIG focus small, my motivational speaking/writing endeavor, is to take a look at barriers. Not dwell on WHY, only to understand how to move beyond.

So I take this first step, and know that there are many more...and part of the way to go forward is to clear the path.

How about you? Are there roadblocks you feel but can't fully identify?

I invite you to think about that, and check back in. This is not a one-blog topic! I would love any feedback or thoughts you have.

Carry this thought today:  In re-evaluating your commitments, ask yourself on a daily basis, in everything you do: 'Is this in alignment with what I am committed to do'?"

We will talk again soon...

BP  :)

Robin Roberts, Coach K, sinkholes...and getting unstuck

I am a writer who hasn't been writing much lately. There are many reasons...and none which sound even remotely valid right now.

But today I am inspired. So here I am.

Inspired by physics, Robin Roberts, my coaching friend Linda, a sinkhole...lots of inspiration!

I didn't dislike high school physics. But what Mr. Ellis didn't explain was the role I have on the energy inside and outside my body. Just wasn't covered in the curriculum. But now I understand better. Now I get that everything is energy, and that I can influence it.

Sound freaky? It really isn't. Abraham Lincoln said most people are as happy as they make their minds up to be. That is positive energy at work. Same with your grandmother saying you would feel better if you smiled instead of pouted. "Lighten up" and "downcast" are very literal descriptions  of our ability to control the energy around us. Think about it.

Robin Roberts has inspired me since her days at ESPN. She ignores the  "black female" barriers and pushes forward. ESPN anchor, ABC morning news reader, Good Morning America host - all easy compared to "two time cancer survivor" and "bone marrow transplant patient." But she pushes on with grace and class and faith. She pushes on, knowing that life is uncertain and cancer is indiscriminant. What choice does she have but to keep dreaming.

Linda Kalafatis is one of the all-time winningest coaches in NCAA softball history. More than that, she committed herself, her heart to her program, her girls, the university. And in May 2012, a day after her team ended the season with 31 wins, she was unceremoniously fired. Life happens like that sometimes. Unexpected. Unfair. But she pushes on. What choice does she have but to keep dreaming?

How about you...what challenges are you facing?

If you have been tracking with me for any time, you know of a long financial struggle caused by litigation. I have learned far more about our country's judicial process than I ever wanted to know. Sometimes it has caused me to get stuck.

Has that happened to you? Have you ever become frozen by a circumstance in your life?  Has it become hard to push on because your dreams seem to be lost?

Yeah, me too.  I have allowed it to affect every corner of my life, acted as if I have no control, as if my dreams are gone.

Then a sinkhole snapped me out of it. If you don't watch the news, you may not have heard about a sinkhole in Florida swallowing a house. A man, asleep in his bed one minute, lost in the Earth the next minute. Death happens like that sometimes. But this piece is not about prophesying doom. It is a call to move. It is a call to LIVE.

Back to physics...I don't have control of the tectonic plates under me, or of other people, or of the court system which has wreaked havoc on my life.

BUT but but...I do have control of me. I absolutely can affect the energy around me. I can decide what I draw to me and what I don't allow. I can trust the One who created all energy, who can cause favor to fall on me, who knows how many hairs are on my head and can see the end from the beginning.

I can acknowledge the challenges but not let them have control.  How about you?

I can take one small step hen another then another, ignoring the screaming voices saying it can't be done. How about you?

I can push on toward my dream. What choice do I have?

Will you join me...can we do it just for today? There are sinkholes everywhere - let's be inspired to take just one step today.

DEAL?

We will talk again soon...

BP :) 

Partridge, Pear Tree, Turtledoves and Tittino

Day 1 and Day 2 of 12

I have neither a partridge in pear tree nor two turtle doves.  And I would not consider either to be a fabulous gift. In case you had any ideas.

But it is symbolic of the "counting down" toward Christmas..

If you have been tracking with me for any time, you know two things. I am motivated by a set number of days or projects. October - 31 Days to Being a Real Writer. November - 30 Days of Gratitude. 12 Days of Christmas. I don't always fulfill each day, but I like the concept.

The other thing you know is that I have been absent for a time. There have been many factors. The biggest one is that sometimes my gift is shut down by difficulties.

Sometimes, the frustration that comes from a 3 year unresolved challenge has been responsible.

And other times life is just painful beyond words.

Let me tell you about one of the best men who ever lived...

 Giambattista Andreassi and his family moved from Italy to Brady's Bend, PA  when he was eighteen months old. He lived the rest of his life in a ten mile radius of his first home. He married Joanne, a woman from the same town.

People called him Tittino or JB or Greaser or Papa or Dad. I called him Uncle John. He called me Bessanne.

Every person who crossed paths with John Andreassi is better for it.  I never heard him say a bad word about anyone. Never. Truly.

And it would shock me to find anyone who had a negative word about him.

In 1951, John and Joanne bought a tiny house and three oil wells.  They added on to the house, raised seven kids there. They bought more oil wells. John worked a second job. Joanne was a substitute rural mail carrier.

They were never featured in a national magazine or on a reality show.

Not glamorous by any standards.

He loved this country and was fond of saying that in the United States a person could be whatever he or she wanted to be - all it took was hard work. He certainly knew about that.  

In time, the oil company grew to the point of being able to sustain his family. But that meant being willing to answer calls and make repairs at all hours and on any day. No customer went without gas because he was tired or it was a holiday. Not even the year he was called out on Christmas and his kids sat and waited for his return before opening gifts.

He was a devout Catholic. Many times, in the face of tragedy or heartbreak, I heard him say, "Whatever the Lord wants - that's how my life will be...whatever the Lord wants." And he lived those words.

Still, if you ask me the first thing that comes into my head about Uncle John, it is this: He loved his family so much. You might say, "Of course he loved his kids- what good man doesn't?" And he did love his kids, and their spouses, and his grandkids.

But it was the depth to which he adored Joanne-ee (his name for her) that sticks in my mind.

My Aunt Joanne was a wonderful lady. I spent at least one week every summer at the Andreassi home, and she treated me like one of her own. I loved her dearly.

She had an abundance of gifts and graces. Being easy wasn't one of them.

But John thought she was the best ever. For him, there was no one like Joanne-ee.  It was evident to all who knew him.

Five years ago, after she passed very suddenly, I stood beside her casket with my arm through his, and he said, "Look at her, Bessanne - isn't she beautiful!" Others have told me he said the same to them on different occasions.

Her passing hit him hard, took a bite out of his spirit. But he never complained, never bemoaned his fate, never cursed fate.

He went on living.

He had a family he loved.

His integrity and kind spirit had fostered a great and wide circle of friends and business acquaintances. He had obligations at the Sons of Italy club in Brady's Bend.

He went on living.

Last summer his garden had 103 tomato plants. He had learned to make homemade pasta noodles and sauce - that had always been Joanne-ee's job. When he entered the hospital in late October, there was one batch of sauce left to make.

Instead, on November 26, he went to be with Joanne-ee, with his parents and brother.

He left a giant hole.

It has been hard to write. Impossible.

I knew this had to be the first blog I wrote, but the words were hidden under grief and tears. Not just mine, but the grief I see on the faces of my beloved cousins, the sadness I hear in their voices.

But we are counting down to Christmas...and he would want us to go on living.

We know he is where he wants to be. With Joanne-ee. With the others he has missed so much. With the Savior whose birth we celebrate.

Our hearts are torn open...but he would remind us that our lives are in the Lord's hands.

And he would urge us to go on living.

Ten days left in the countdown.

Finally I am able to write again.

Thanks, Uncle John. Give Aunt Joanne a kiss for me.

We'll see you both later.

Time to go on living.

Day 3 brings French hens - no idea what to do with them!

We will talk tomorrow...

BP

SURPRISE, Scaring people, and 30 days of Gratitude

Day 14

Maybe I shouldn't admit this, but I still like to surprise people by staying out of sight - fine, call it hiding if you must - then saying BOO when they come close.

It is silly, but always brings a laugh. From me anyway. And people fall for it over and over. Perhaps they think I will grow up some day? HA!

Life is full of surprises, isn't it?

Lots of bad surprises, challenging ones, debilitating ones.

You've had those, haven't you?

So have I.

But then there are the sweet surprises...

Big surprises like a healthy baby when pregnancy seemed unlikely. An unexpected check when the bank account was empty. The return of an estranged family member.

Small surprises like a kind note from a friend. An unseasonably warm and sunny day. One more bloom from the rose bush.

It is of great interest to me to note that the more gratitude I have, the more likely I am to stumble on nice surprises. Coinkydink? Nah.

Try it for yourself.

Gratitude opens a door, and draws happy thoughts, new friends, renewed energy, all sorts of things that brighten your life.

Just for today, do your best to smile, say thanks for all the blessings you have, be kind - you will be surprised by the effect it has on your world. One of the surprises may even change your life!

November is a month of gratitude...will you join me?

We will talk again tomorrow...

BP

SURPRISE, Scaring people, and 30 days of Gratitude

Day 14

Maybe I shouldn't admit this, but I still like to surprise people by staying out of sight - fine, call it hiding if you must - then saying BOO when they come close.

It is silly, but always brings a laugh. From me anyway. And people fall for it over and over. Perhaps they think I will grow up some day? HA!

Life is full of surprises, isn't it?

Lots of bad surprises, challenging ones, debilitating ones.

You've had those, haven't you?

So have I.

But then there are the sweet surprises...

Big surprises like a healthy baby when pregnancy seemed unlikely. An unexpected check when the bank account was empty. The return of an estranged family member.

Small surprises like a kind note from a friend. An unseasonably warm and sunny day. One more bloom from the rose bush.

It is of great interest to me to note that the more gratitude I have, the more likely I am to stumble on nice surprises. Coinkydink? Nah.

Try it for yourself.

Gratitude opens a door, and draws happy thoughts, new friends, renewed energy, all sorts of things that brighten your life.

Just for today, do your best to smile, say thanks for all the blessings you have, be kind - you will be surprised by the effect it has on your world. One of the surprises may even change your life!

November is a month of gratitude...will you join me?

We will talk again tomorrow...

BP

Words with Friends, Cancer and 30 Days of Gratitude

Day 13

One in three...1 in 3. Strong odds. And not good when the subject is cancer.

Today, my dear friend Nancy finished 30 days of radiation for a recurrence of ovarian cancer. She had endured chemotherapy during the summer.

Cancer is ugly. The treatment can be ugly as well. But today was the conclusion of treatment.  Today, at the end of this game, the score stands: Nancy- 2, Cancer- 0!

Certainly reason to celebrate and be grateful for God's provision.

I don't know how it feels to have cancer. But, twice, I have walked this road with Nancy.

So I do know the power of prayer.

I know the comfort that comes from a note, a call, a meal, a hundred other gestures.

I have seen how touched Nancy has been by this kindness from friends and church family.

As a writer, I spend much time reading, being moved by the words of other writers, seeking inspiration in every situation, every normal moment of the day.

Sometimes that comes from best-selling authors, from obscure authors, from the Bible.

Sometimes it comes from a conversation I hear, a life I glimpse for just a moment.

Very often, inspiration and strength for the day comes from friends who may or may not know it.

Today, from Barb - Struggling is God's way of getting us to pay attention, since we are more alert when we're needy. It's quite humbling, really. 

And from Tricia - Life is hard Beth, isn't it? And then, it is suddenly wonderful....

Today was a day of celebration - for that I am grateful

Words from beloved friends sharpened my focus. For that I am even more grateful.

What sharpened your focus today?

November is a month of gratitude...will you join me?

We will talk again tomorrow.

BP

Cuisinart, Irritation and 30 Days of Gratitude

Day 12

Jumping back into the blog pool after missing two days. The only person who chastises me for missing days is, well, me! The world of blogging, and the world in general, keeps turning if I tune out for a couple days.

Yeah, grateful for that.

And Cuisinart Customer Service did not hear from me today. Very grateful for that.

Here is the back story. I have a Cuisinart coffee maker - Grind and Brew to be specific. A year or so after purchase, it became impossible to remove the grinder for cleaning. Actually, it toyed with us for some time. Minor struggles one day, no struggle for two days, huge struggle one day, repeat. Finally it just wouldn't come out at all. I called Cuisinart to register this frustration, albeit with no expectation since the machine was more than a year old. To my surprise, the representative offered to send a replacement machine at no cost! It seemed likely this was a known issue Cuisinart was trying to correct. "Trying" being the operative word.

The new machine is just over a year old and - you guessed it - the grinder won't come out.

This has been coming on, as it did last time. But today was not a day to mess with me.

Several people I love are struggling with illness. So many other folks I know are hurting - emotionally, financially, in relationships. Lots of pain all around - and in my face today.

So no, I wasn't in the mood for a stubborn grinder. I was very determined to get that sucker out. VERY determined. Pulled. Grunted. Pulled harder. Unplugged the pot and put it on the floor. Tried sliding a knife under to pry it off. Pulled with both hands. Said unpleasant things.

Then I noticed the dogs were sitting in the doorway with the "someone is in trouble" look on their faces.

And suddenly, I was grateful.

Grateful for the wisdom of dogs.

Grateful I didn't have to look up Cuisinart's phone number, wait on hold, have my anger multiply with every minute of being on hold.

Grateful for a matured spirit that tells me coffee pots aren't worth the energy anger requires.

Grateful for a willingness to relax, use ground coffee, buy a new coffee pot soon...and know that none of that will change the world one way or the other. It just isn't important enough to matter for more than a minute.

How about you? Have you had a moment like this?

I hope so. Very freeing. Light-bringing. Soul-opening.

November...a month of gratitude. Will you join me?

We will talk again tomorrow.

BP

Struggling, Remembering and 30 Days of Gratitude

Day 9

The bright sunshine reminded me that today I can be grateful for the abundant grace and mercy showering my life daily.

Good thing, because I am not feeling much gratitude today.

At all.

Have you been there?

I know...people recovering from  a hurricane...people with end stage disease...people in warzones...many people with bigger problems.

I KNOW. I do.

But the situation with which I have been struggling for 3 years is pressing down hard. I am weary to the bone.

Have you been there?

Every day I wake up with hope of resolution. Sometimes it lasts most of the day before disappointment sets in. Other days, like today, I find out very early about another delay, another setback, no resolution.

It isn't the worst problem in the world. But it is sucking the energy out of me.

Have you been there?

So I make myself breath properly.

I look at the blue sky.

I pet my dog.

I am delighted to unexpectedly cross paths with a dear friend.

And I hold as tightly as possible to this knowledge: Whatever report a day brings, Jesus can override it.

Eventually - in HIS time - all will be well. This too shall pass.

I am grateful for that - and for the grace and mercy sustaining me until then.

Gratitude in spite of circumstances...

Have you been there?  

November...30 days of gratitude. Will you join me?

We will talk again soon...

BP 

Michael Jackson, Change..and 30 Days of Gratitude

Day 8

Two days after the fact, and the noise is slowly beginning to subside. Over-enthusiastic people whose candidates won, Chicken Littles whose candidates lost. Madness.

So now what? We all go back to sitting around waiting for politicians to fix things?

Today I am thankful for the ability to affect change in my home, my church, my town, my nation.

How about you?

You want change? So do I. But I am not content to sit around and wait.

Is that what you want?

Waiting for politicians to change has failed us miserably. Yet, we continue to do it, don't we?

And it must stop. Now.

We have the power to change our world. In fact, we are the only ones who have the power.

For that, I am very grateful.

I'm going to make a change for once in my life

It's gonna feel real good

Gonna make a difference, gonna make it right

We complain about jobs going to China. What if we stopped shopping at places like Wal-mart that sell primarily Chinese goods? What if we take the time to seek out products made in the United States?

We make a difference every time we buy Made in America.

We complain about the state of our towns. What if we make more of an effort to patronize local businesses - you know, the ones that are owned by your neighbor... the businesses that pay taxes locally, the neighbors who spend their money in the same grocery stores and gas stations you do...the neighbors who send their children to local schools and sit behind you at church?

We can make huge differences in our local economy, one purchase, one meal at a time.

We rage about government assistance programs. Is there any way we can affect change in this area? Well, we could continue to make and/or repeat nasty remarks about "those people" being lazy and good-for-nothing and unproductive members of society. We could continue to assume we know why they need help. We self-righteously declare that we would never be in a similar situation.

But what if we started a grass roots movement in our towns to understand, to determine the best way to help? I hear people say we should simply stop all government assistance and let churches and social groups pick up the slack. What if we were so successful at helping people climb out the hole that assistance become unnecessary for many families?  We can do that - one coat, one meal, one GED, one job at a time.

As I turned up the collar on my favorite winter

This wind is blowin' my mind

I see the kids in the street with not enough to eat

Who am I to be blind, pretending not to see their need?

We rage even more rabidly about services like Planned Parenthood. We throw nasty labels at women, assuming we know exactly how they feel, what their circumstances are.

What if we reached out, held out our hands instead of holding nasty signs? There are pregnancy resource centers in many towns. Most of them are privately funded. Have you ever donated money or time?  

Signs will never change anyone's mind. Legislation will never change anyone's mind. Love can change minds, one young woman at a time.

A willow deeply scarred, somebody's broken heart

And a washed out dream

They follow the pattern of the wind ya see

'Cause they got no place to be that's why I'm starting with me


You might be thinking these ideas are simplistic. I'm sure they are.

You might be saying, "Who is this hippie who thinks each of us can change a small part of the world?"

Maybe you are right.

But what if we can make changes?

What if turning our great nation around is up to us- not politicians, not corporations, not Wall Street but US?

Gratefully I say:

I'm starting with the man in the mirror...I'm asking him to change his ways

And no message could have been any clearer

If you wanna make the world a better place

Take a look at yourself and then make that change  

November - 30 Days of Gratitude. Will you join me?

We will talk again tomorrow...

BP

My ruler...Whining...and 30 Days of Gratitude

Nov 7

Today is rather direct.

I am thankful to live in the greatest country in the world.

But I am more thankful for a secure future. Not because of who occupies the White House. Not EVER for that reason.

I believe my life is in the Hands of One far more powerful than any human being. I believe He always has the best in store for me. I believe He owns the cattle on a thousand hills, and has all the resources I need to live an abundant life. No man can take that away.

How about you?

If you are a Christian, I am wondering why you are bemoaning your fate this morning? Why are you whining and being a sore loser?

If you are a Christian, the President does not control your life.

If your beliefs don't line up exactly with mine, there is still good news.

YOU alone control your destiny.

Not your family. Not the hand you were dealt. Not your current station in life.

NOT the government. MY GOODNESS - not the government.

I am grateful that I can CHOOSE where my attention and efforts go.

I can CHOOSE my attitude.

I can CHOOSE where my life goes.

You can too. Do you believe it?

If you don't like your life, change it. Determine your own destiny.

Gratitude opens doors.

Gratitude clears your path.   

Gratitude is a multiplier of everything good in your life.

And be very sure that lack of gratitude does just the opposite.

I give all praise and honor and gratitude to the God who made me and saves me.

He has made me GLAD.

I hope you are or will come to be full of gratitude.

Not "because" of anything...in spite of everything.

November...30 Days of gratitude. Will you join me?

C'mon - get HAPPY!!!

We will talk again soon...

BP

Van Morrison, Sugar, and 30 Days of Gratitude

Day 3

Today I am grateful for laughter. And Trick or Treat. And college football. And good music.  And ice cream.

All which made my day better, in spite of some darkness.

This week has been filled with no resolution to my ongoing issue, daily 100 mile trips with a loved one who is receiving radiation, visits to another hospital to see a beloved uncle, images of Hurricane Sandy all over the news, political nastiness...bad vibes all around.

But I laughed with several family members today - always a good day, even in a hospital!

And my Nittany Lions won again  - always cause for celebration.

And how can anyone not dance, even in the car, when this comes on:

Well, it's a marvelous night for a moondance with the stars up above in your eyes...

You know the night's magic seems to whisper and hush

And all the soft moonlight seems to shine in your blush

See, you're smiling, aren't you??  

And goblins and Super Heroes and ghosts and skeletons came to my door this evening for candy, leaving giggles as a trade-off. One kind of sugar for another!

AND I still have almost 2 quarts of the best Butter Pecan ice cream in the world. More sugar!! Strict rationing is in effect as it must last until March. But even a spoonful is wonderful!

This hasn't been the best week. 

Gratitude is still my choice.

How about you?

Will you choose gratitude in spite of, rather than because of?

November - 30 Days of Gratitude...will you join me?

We will talk tomorrow...

BP

Spewing, Smoldering and A Month of Gratitude

Day Two of  a Month of Gratitude

If you have been tracking with me for any time, you know I am waiting for resolution to a long-standing issue. LONG-standing.

There was reason to hope the resolution would come this week. Every day waking up with hope. Every day disappointed.

The delay this morning hit me hard because now we must wait until Monday. I was intentioanlly wallowing in my frustration, verbalizing, acting out...

And I heard the whisper in my ear...GRATITUDE?

UGH

Deep breath.

Refocus.

So, on Day 2, I am thankful for the acquired ability to control myself!

Acquired ability. My natural wiring likes to wallow and/or act out. That circuitry has been reinforced by people close to me. "I can't help it - that's just how I am" was something I wore proudly.

How about you? Is your natural inclination to spew, stomp, show your frustration loud and clear?

Or maybe you are inclined, instead, to stew? You appear to handle things well, even tell others they should not get so upset. But inside the anger is smoldering, just waiting to explode.

Acquired ability.

Years of prayer, meditation, steps and missteps, concerted effort.

And here is the hardest part: accepting the responsibility. Understanding that much of our emotional turmoil is self-inflicted.

Initially, I didn't like that much.

How about you? Are you excited about taking ownership of your emotions? 

You should be. Owning your emotions is one of the most freeing choices you can make.

Freedom from the results of immediate spewing. Freedom from the delayed results of smoldering. Freedom for loved ones. Freedom.

I am not perfect. Self-infliction still occurs - like it did this morning.

BUT I recognize it quickly. I pull myself out.  

My world is drastically better for it.

How about you? How would your world change if you owned your emotions? Dealt with them quickly and honestly?

I would love to hear your thoughts.

November - a month of gratitude. Will you join me?

We will talk again tomorrow...

BP

30 days of Gratitude...Join me?

Well, October is passed us. I participated in a writing project in October, and while I did not write every single day, it was a worthy venture. I learned much, including that I am, indeed, a REAL writer! On days I didn't write, there was a noticeable hole. 

Writing is not just something I enjoy - it is something I must do. Like singing, writing is an extension of my soul. Good lesson.

Now November...my birthday, Thanksgiving, my birthday, the start of Christmas madness, and did I mention my birthday?

Gratitude is a resounding theme for this month. You may have seen other writers dedicating their blogs to 30 Days of Being Thankful. Add mine to the list.

On this first day of the month, I am grateful for the reinforcement of just how much writing means to mean.

How about you?
I hope you will join me and think about gratitude for the next 29 days.

We will talk again tomorrow...Until then, ponder these words from hymn writer Martin Rinkart:

Now thank we all our God,with heart and hands and voices,

who wondrous things has done,in whom this world rejoices;

who from our mothers' arms has blessed us on our way

with countless gifts of love, and still is ours today.

BP

Christmas planning and 31 Days to Being a Real Writer

Day 23.

That's right - October 23. So quickly.

We are already being bombarded by Christmas commercials and merchandise. UGH

Remember when you knew you would just DIE if you didn't get that toy, game, electronic gadget?

Remember when you knew you would just DIE if someone in the office gave you a gift and you didn't have one to give in return?

Remember when you knew you would just DIE if you didn't have the right clothes for the Christmas Dance, the Christmas office bash, the party at the wealthy church family's home?  

Yeah, I remember too...silly thoughts

But here is what I know to be true: No matter where we live, we all pass people every single day who have desperate needs. We learn to look through people, to steel ourselves. Sometimes we tell ourselves they are lazy, comfortable in their "entitlements" and beyond help.

And know this: behind every adult we scorn for not pulling his or her own weight, there are almost always kids.

Innocent kids. With no voice.

Maybe they don't attend your child's school. But they exist somewhere within your reach.

Do you really see them? 

Do you have any idea how desperate life can be when one or both of your parents is a substance abuser, or a child abuser?

Do you ever stop to imagine how hard life is when your single-parent works two jobs, still can't put food on the table, and is never around just to be Mom or Dad?

Do you have any idea how much you wouldn't care about spelling or algebra when you didn't have a blanket on your bed, or a coat to wear, or breakfast?

No matter what your feelings about "entitlements" are, NO child deserves to have a lousy life.

Think about it. 

What would happen if every one of us redirected 25% of our Christmas spending?

What if we choose not to buy for the relative who has everything?

What if we choose not to participate in Secret Santa, choose not to buy a co-worker another coffee mug or Starbucks gift card?

What if we choose to limit what our kids found under the tree (is it REALLY necessary to have every device Apple makes??) and, as a family, shopped for a kid who may not even get an apple.

You're right...some people spend their assistance money unwisely.

THAT ISN'T THE FAULT OF THEIR CHILDREN. Yes, I am yelling about that.

Kids need coats. They need decent clothes - more than one pair of jeans, more than 2 shirts. They need shoes that fit and don't have holes.

Mostly, they need to know someone - anyone - cares.    

Are you foolish enough to not consider the societal impact of a kid with no coat, insufficient shoes, nothing but junk food? 

Those kids become teenagers who learn how to take what they don't have. Those teenagers become adults lacking in education and job skills...and the cycle repeats.

Opportunities abound. Coat drives, mittens/gloves/hat trees, Angel trees with all the information you need - sizes, favorite color, coveted toy.

You won't need to look far. It won't be hard work...in fact, it may be the most fun you have during this Christmas season!

What if we all decided to be grateful, then be generous?

What if we teach our kids to understand how blessed they are, then SHOW them how to be generous?

What if you changed ONE kid's life? And your co-worker changed ONE kid's life? And your church changed 200 kids' lives?

What if we start a revolution of kindness and caring in our towns?

You say, what if it doesn't matter? 

But what if it does?

Will you join me?

I would love to hear your ideas!

We will talk again soon...

BP